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Kyiv National University of Trade and Economics

FITL 1-3a Vynnyk Anastasiia
REPORT

Emotional influence

How do con artists manage to scam millions? Why do people choose to follow great leaders, or horrible ones? How do CEOs get better deals in the boardroom? Influence!

It goes by a lot of names. Emotional intelligence, manipulation, social skills. Influence is an important tool that drives business decisions and social interactions. Butwith great power comes great responsibility.

Influence has a dark side too, and can be used to pressure people into making some pretty bad decisions. So this is basically our defense against the dark arts episode.

We trust people because of emotional reasons, like your gut instinct when you first meet them. Sometimes, emotional cues can match up with cognitive trust.

Maybe someone’s giving you really bad vibes, and when you scroll down their social profiles, your suspicions are confirmed! Or your gut might be trying to get you out of a situation that feels dangerous.

Always remember: if you’re freaked - pepper spray first, apologize later.

Then, there’s the flip side. You might feel good about someone who turns out not to be trustworthy. Influence relies heavily on charisma.

If someone’s more likeable, they tend to be trusted more easily and can influence others. As we’ve seen from the #MeToo movement, or really anytime a popular person does a horrible thing, having charisma does not mean someone has good character or is good at their job. Charisma isn’t always nefarious, though.

It can be used as a force of good - to help you make a great first impression or give

a persuasive public speech. And it’s not some magical gift that’s bestowed upon you.

So, how can we converts admiration to influence?!

Charismatic leaders achieve results through presence and personality. People seek the approval of charismatic leaders. They love giving them what they want.

Magnetism and influence characterize charismatic leaders.
Here you got 10 ways to enhance your charisma:

  1. Approve of yourself. Charismatic leaders don’t need to be liked and don’t try to please everyone.

  2. Attack an enemy. Charismatic leaders rage against what’s wrong. “This can’t go on!” Fight against waste, injustice, or abuse.

  3. Demonstrate optimism. Powerless leaders spew disapproval without optimism. Anyone can complain. Charismatic leaders articulate compelling vision.

  4. Clarify focus. We are drawn to people who know what they want.

  5. Act with courage.

  6. Show commitment.

  7. Be outgoing. Charismatic leaders mingle.

  8. Affirm others.

  9. Express disapprove. Willingness to disapprove gives power to affirmations. The most charismatic leaders expressed strong disapproval. Think of Jesus, Gandhi, or Martin Luther King Jr.

  10. Believe you will win.

Bonus: Earn and receive the approval of people with power.

Unfortunately, even charisma has a downside, for example:

  • Isolation.

  • Over-dependence. Organizations that relax because the leader will save them are doomed.

  • Exemption. “I’m better than others.”

  • Exploitation. “Just do what I say.”


  • Over-cooperation. It’s already difficult for people to speak the truth to you. Who speaks hard truths into your life?

  • Unrealistic optimism.

  • Abuse – things like using power to belittle others rather than address issues.

  • Self-importance and arrogance.

All these nuances are important to know not to fall for such tricks from others. So, here we have got 4 ways to manage charismatic leaders:

  1. Expect and monitor delegating activities. Charismatic leaders make it all about themselves.

  2. Provide frequent honest feedback. Leaders who reject feedback are too big for their breeches.

  3. Focus on results. Dig below the hype and ask, what is really getting done.

  4. Evaluate peoples reactions. Confront the expectation of head-nodding.

Charisma is a skill you can build over time with the personality traits you’ve got.

Tons of factors play a role. But to keep it simple, here are three main things that leading organizational psychologists say can make you more likeable:

confidence, praise, and optimism.

Plus, they can also help you think about why you’re trusting a charismatic person, and whether or not you should.

Confidence is the number one way to build charisma and emotional influence. It makes you seem more relaxed and capable in high-pressure situations. Capable people aren’t always as confident as they could be. Maybe you’re shy, or have impostor syndrome and you’re afraid you don’t belong at your job.

You deserve to be recognized for your achievements, and there are ways to make yourself shine.

For example, you can avoid uncertain language, like ‘maybe,’ ‘in my opinion,’ ‘I think’ or ‘I could be wrong.’ Sure, if you’re a journalist trying to separate your opinion and a citation, these phrases can be helpful. But in business writing, they can make it seem like you doubt yourself. And if you know it, show it!

Simple things like using good posture, projecting your voice, and making direct eye contact can signal confidence.

Some people use power posing. Or you just can faking it ‘till you make it. But if you aren’t sure what you’re talking about, you can leave things to experts instead of risking your credibility. All of these tips can also help you analyze why someone else might seem confident, so you don’t misplace your trust.

So, we need avoid being influenced just because someone acts like they know what they’re doing. Look for cognitive cues like competence, intent, and integrity too.

But charisma isn’t just about confidence. It’s also about how you interact with other people, which involves way more than just being polite.

Praise is a powerful motivator. It’s why seeing a gold star on a report card feels so good.

Sometimes people underestimate the importance of intrinsic motivators like recognition. And they overestimate extrinsic motivators, like money or time off.

Don’t get me wrong. Equitable pay is a real thing that needs to happen. None of this “working for exposure or Instagram followers” stuff. But, you need to put food on the table, and bonus checks are valuable.

But on top of having the time and money to live comfortably, positive feedback can make sure people feel that their work is valued throughout the year.

Too much praise can make you come across as fake, though. And watch out for people who only say nice things when they want a favor - they might seem trustworthy at first glance, but it’s manipulative.

Positive feedback makes others feel good. Optimism can make you feel good, which shows.

This can work wonders for your vibe, your motivation, and your career.

Malcolm Forbes, you know, the guy that published the fancy business magazine in waiting rooms everywhere, once said “The key to success is not through achievement, but through enthusiasm.”

But how to properly motivate those around you? Here are a few psychological rules for managing motivation:

  1. Positive reinforcement is more effective and constructive than negative, especially in the long term.

American psychologist B. Skinner writes, "The person who has been punished does not consequently become less inclined to behave as before, at best he learns how to avoid punishment. Positive reinforcement actively shapes behavior in the desired direction, increases self-esteem, motivates learning new skills, and increases initiative. People rarely believe they have been punished fairly, so in the long run, negative reinforcement causes overt or covert resistance.

  1. Unpredictable and irregular incentives stimulate better than expected and predictable ones. People quickly become accustomed to an established incentive system. If an incentive becomes expected, it quickly loses its motivating power - a person simply stops responding to it. Moreover, the absence of the expected incentive will be perceived as unfair. So instead of stimulating, an inhibitory effect occurs. A vivid example of this rule is the system of "progressives" widely used in previous years, when all its employees received a certain wage increment for fulfillment of the plan by the company. Because the plan was almost always fulfilled, this bonus was regarded as part of the wages and gave little incentive to the workers. Its infrequent absence caused dissatisfaction among the workers. Consequently, even systems of incentives that have proven effective should be changed from time to time.

  2. Incentives must be specific and immediate; the longer the time interval, the smaller the effect. A person must know exactly what exactly was rewarded. Then these desirable actions will be fixed and will be further developed. Immediate encouragement stimulates employees and their surroundings stronger than the delayed encouragement. It can take many forms. For example, IBM president T. Watson introduced the practice of writing checks right on the spot for achievements he discovered during his rounds of enterprises.

  3. Large and rare awards usually arouse envy, small and frequent - satisfaction. People assess their achievements mainly by comparison with the results of others, rather than by absolute values. The difference between one's own earnings and those of a colleague is sometimes a more consistent factor in satisfaction than earnings themselves. High, rare awards discourage the rest of the staff, all those who have not received them. They cause tensions among staff, lead to deterioration of relationships. At the same time, small, frequent and many-received rewards have a positive effect on the individual and the team as a whole.

These rules can be used in absolutely all spheres of our life.

There are things beyond our control that can drastically affect optimism, from tough events like the death of a loved one, to mental health conditions that may require professional treatment.

Generally, though, you can become more optimistic by learning from mistakes in the past, finding things to appreciate in the present, and looking forward to future opportunities.

Really, optimism involves having a balanced outlook. And sometimes, it’s better to look before you leap. If someone’s blindly optimistic about a situation, but you’re not 100%, don’t be afraid to do your own research.

Now, charisma is a powerful form of influence that works even when people don’t know each other very well.

But the best way to genuinely build emotional influence is to form strong relationships based on mutual honesty and respect. So treat your coworkers like humans! Of course, it is important to have a cohesive team, where team members are compatible and complementary, where everyone is willing to help a colleague and openly share their plans. People in a friendly team are less stressed and cope better with fatigue. And knowing a person well, it is easier to approach him or her and easier to manage. Try using people’s names, and pronounce them correctly. It’s an easy thing to do, and makes a big impact. And find some common ground with them.

Maybe you’re in the same department, in the same screenwriting class, or share the same fandom.

Mutual pettiness can bring people together, too. Remember when people were all about Twilight and whether Bella should end up with Jacob or Edward? There were t-shirts. It was a whole thing.

But as we all know from Thanksgiving dinner, some topics can be touchy, like religion or politics. So be thoughtful about what conversations you bring into the workplace.

To achieve more and avoid failure, you have to use emotional intelligence, which is an important part of our behavior. Here are three simple techniques that anyone can adopt.

  1. Acting.

No matter how you feel, try to act out the state you want to create in others. According to James-Lange's law, we laugh first, then we rejoice. The body gets the signal that all is well, and sends the opposite signal, "all is well!" And the person gets better. This method helps to manage both oneself and others. The difficulty is that a person does not want to play, but to sincerely express his emotions - especially if it is an emotion of irritation and anger. But this is unlikely to enhance one's performance. There is emotionality and emotional intelligence. Emotionalism responds to reasons; emotional intelligence acts for a purpose.

Play what contributes to the goal.

  1. The Lizard Effect.

You can control others even if you have lost your "tail"-that is, even if you are not quite capable of controlling yourself and don't even understand how you feel. Keep acting, even if you are down, discouraged, confused, and have lost faith in yourself. Responsibility for another person is known to make us stronger. Managing others is a responsibility, a job.

You don't know what to do - generate joy and interest. What is the most interesting and joyful thing for a person? That which pleases him, is useful, beneficial or brings him relief. You can tell the person something good about himself, to emphasize his importance, his contribution to the cause. You can make a joke to brighten up the situation. You can gradually develop the ability to respond in this way to any ambiguous event. Reading Oscar Wilde's plays "An Ideal Husband," "Lady Windermere's Fan" and "How Important It Is to Be Serious" also helps to develop this reaction. This method helps to manage the emotional state of others. Its additional effect is to improve one's own condition.

  1. "Turning to the Future."

The essence of the technique is to talk only about future improvements, not about past mistakes. Criticism and negative feedback can upset a person so much that he or she becomes despondent and completely ineffective. A person is not interested in talking about his dark past, much more interested in a bright future. If you want to improve someone's performance, talk about the future. About how you propose to work and interact in the future. This method helps to keep the other person in a resourceful state.


So you know how we keep bringing up the light and dark sides of influence?

Well, another huge part of that is how humans frequently judge things based on looks. Like, you’d probably trust a car from a fancy dealership more than a vacant lot with a cardboard sign saying “carz 4 sale heer.”

So appearances matter.

It might seem superficial, but your look contributes to professionalism, which impacts promotions, job interviews, and acceptance in the workplace.

The good news is that you can control big pieces of your appearance. Do your hair. Brush your teeth. Don’t show up to work in pajamas with pizza stains from your Stranger Things binge last night. It shows you take your job seriously if you wear clothing that fits your office and profession.

Some businesses have dress codes, uniforms, or frown upon people wearing something drastically different. So find ways to express yourself that fit your workplace, like wearing that vintage dress you love, or trying to pull off a polka dot bow tie.

But remember that not all aspects of appearance are within your control - we have messy biases based on gender, race, or even arbitrary things like attractiveness.

You can’t help it if you look eerily similar to someone’s manipulative ex, or if your resting face is angry. And sometimes what’s deemed professional isn’t necessarily fair, like dress code policies on natural hair.

So it’s important to recognize what drives your reasoning for trust.

Like, have you put too much trust in the demure old lady in pink, when really she has a horrible track record and may be entirely unhinged?

In any competitive field you are bound to encounter a wolf in sheep's clothing. They may seem innocent, but they have ulterior motives. They will use different tactics to cover their intentions.

The person who is kind to you but discredits you when you are not around is a wolf in sheep's clothing. A wolf in sheep's clothing can pull ideas out of you and then pass them off as their own in order to get a promotion. They always take care of themselves at the cost of other people.

This kind of cover-up has its advantages.

People don't go out of their way to manipulate others if they get nothing out of it. Wolves are able to hide their emotions-it gives the wolf a chance to manipulate others to improve their own position. They know that what they are trying to do will not get them excited, or it may lead to difficulties if they openly prove themselves.

They can do what they want to do with less hindrance if they incorporate their acting skills. As long as people understand their real motives, the wolf will have what it wants.

Signs of a wolf in sheep's clothing:

They live to seize power instead of supporting others. The wolf uses people as a means to an end to get what they want. They don't care what happens to others. A wolf at work can make you look bad during a presentation so that they themselves look great in the eyes of the boss.

Wolves seem nice on the outside, but they will show you their teeth. If wolves showed their true nature, people wouldn't interact with them. They develop a friendly or kind appearance, but they can't play around. Eventually, they would show their aggressive tendencies. A wealthy person who likes to break the law may make substantial donations to charity to convince people that they are kind and caring. These donations mostly help them avoid trouble, but if someone takes them out, they will ruin that person's reputation to stifle criticism.

They manipulate emotions to get what they want. Wolves know they can gain an advantage by appealing to your emotions. They figure out what you want and what you need, and they give you enough to sit quietly and be malleable. Imagine your boss is a wolf in sheep's clothing and you want to ask for a vacation. He might try to play on your guilt and insecurity to get you to skip vacation or take fewer days off.

In the beginning, the wolf will charm you. Wolves are experts at manipulating those around them. They seem interested in whatever you are doing, and you will feel like they care. When you get where they want you, they do exactly what they need to do to keep you hooked. This is the co-worker who started out by being your friend, but ends up dumping responsibility on you. When he sees that you are annoyed, he will surprise you with something to charm you even more. Then he will continue to do what he wants.

Cracking the wolf is the surest way to make them fuss. When this person tries to make up a story, it won't make much sense because they are improvising.

How do you figure out the wolf?

Sort things out so that you have as many facts as possible before you start working with them. Trace how they respond in certain situations, or offer them hypothetical problems to see how they respond.

The wolves will tell you something from which they will, as a result, benefit. Gather evidence that will support their position or vice versa, and see what happens. There is a chance that when you choose a side that supports their plan, they will act like your best friend. If you don't agree, they will become aggressive.

Figuring out a potential wolf - especially if you're among sheep - can be quite difficult. If your instinct tells you that a wolf is lurking among other sheep, be careful and be sure to take the next step - ask questions, the more the better

There is nothing wrong with asking questions to uncover the truth. The safety of everyone in your group is at risk. Since wolves often make up stories, you will be able to identify them when details are lacking in their stories.

Wolves are everywhere.

As much as we'd like to believe that everyone has the best of intentions, that's not always the case. Some people only do what they can profit from, and they don't care who they hurt in the process.

Wolves in sheep's clothing can be found in almost any environment. You can't get rid of them, but if you figure them out, you avoid their traps.

Anyone can be susceptible to emotional influence. That’s why it’s so important in business - and everywhere else - to think about why you’re trusting someone. Just because someone has the latest ferrari and a custom suit, it doesn’t mean they’re not a snake oil salesman.

Pause for a second when a confident and optimistic person seems like they’re selling you something that’s way too good be true. If it feels like they’re glossing over key parts of their business model, trust your gut and ask questions. And if they start using flattery to distract you while you’re questioning them, maybe reconsider who you’re dealing with.

Remember cognitive trust? Check their qualifications. See if they have good intent and a history of delivering on their promises. That way, you can put the puzzle pieces together to make a more complete picture of their character, and protect yourself from influential but shady people.

Together, your actions, attitude, and appearance can affect how others see you and the influence you have in the workplace and beyond.

So take time to think about the way you’re being perceived by others, and always use your influence wisely. Don’t make anyone do something they’ll regret later.
To conclude:

Charisma — is something that we pay attention to while deciding whether to trust to this person or no. Of course, all these processes are unconscious, but still extremely important.

Charisma consists of three aspects: confidence, praise and optimism.

Confidence should be seen in your every word and every movement you make. Confident people receive more trust from others because they considered to know what to do. They can lead teams and be mentors. You should avoid saying phrases like “maybe”, “in my opinion” etc. if you want to appear confident. However, you should not become self-confident in a way that you are not sure in your words, but still saying them. Leave the deal to the experts if you feel the lack of knowledge in any question.

Praising other people will help you to encourage them. However, you should be careful with people that only praise you without any rational criticism or with people who only do it when they need something from you.

Optimism is a feature of character that subconsciously raises trust. You may have noticed that people who are reasonably optimistic make everybody around them optimistic too.

Main takeaway point from this part is that you can train your charisma, because it is not something with what people generally born.

Following takeaway point is that appearance does matter in a question of first impression. The main thing is to look suitable for the situation. Do you hair, iron your clothes and try to look smart if you want people around you to trust you.

Last, but not least, we have to use the influence responsibly and we have to be aware of other’s people influence. Several examples are given to show how frauds are using their charisma and influence to trick people into monkey business.

Of everything we talked about, remember these key takeaways:

  • Influence should be used responsibly, and you can use cognitive trust and emotional cues to protect yourself from people who abuse it.

  • You can up your charisma by acting confident, praising others, and being optimistic.

  • Finding common ground is the foundation of relationships and can increase your trustworthiness.

  • Appearances do matter.



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